When we follow our soul we create magic.

From a premier in April 2023.

Way back, even before Covid, I had felt myself being called to visit California. I made a lot of friends via my Instagram poetry account there and I had also had a poem published in a Literary review in Sacramento. 

I had no other experiences of California, apart from seeing Julia Roberts shopping on the two-mile-long, prestigious Rodeo Drive in Pretty Woman. (BIG MISTAKE.) My grandmother and I had watched it together from a remote part of the newly born Czech Republic. Not used to Capitalism, democracy, and, well – freedom, we watched it in fascination. Mainly for the love story, of course, but the notion of another world left an imprint. 

Years later, what I’d remember is that there is a place in the world that values story. A place where people’s creativity and narratives are prized and filmed. What that meant to me, I suppose, was possibility. And that is the one thing we can probably all agree on is a wonderful part of the American Dream. To do and be anything. 

In my life, this was sorely needed. 

I had ended a relationship that I didn’t want to leave. I’d been stuck for months in grief, anger, denial, and fear. Then, as usually happens to me, the Universe stepped in. For a couple of already sleepless nights, the intercom kept sounding out. At 2 am, 3 am, buzz buzz. I was lying awake anyway, in my What now? haze, but it really began to freak me out.

The battery was fine. There was nothing wrong, at least, mechanically.

When I opened the window, there was no one tottering outside, drunk and tired, mistaking my place for theirs. Holding my duvet for comfort and lifting the receiver, all I heard was static and white noise.

When I went to my acupuncturist, Lucie smiled gleefully and said,

“Well, so are you going to leave? The Universe is at your door, ringing the bell.” 

I felt scared to do what I had wanted, what I desired. After all, we’re taught that responsibilities and others come first. We often come last, and if we’re codependent, we don’t consider ourselves at all.

But finally, with the Universe on my heels and coupled with my best friend’s and sister-in-law’s support, I got my ESTA and decided to say yes to a trip to Los Angeles. I decided to say yes to MYSELF.

And guess what? It was pure magic with all the green lights you could imagine; from finding good flights to the accommodation to the entire trip itself. We can feel it in our bones when we are in alignment.

—

I arrived in L.A. about 4 pm and got myself an Uber to my Airbnb. I had managed to land a place to stay with Joycelyne Lew, actress and fellow inspirational creative through my sister-in-law.

The entire way, I kept metaphorically pinching myself, because I couldn’t believe I’d done it. I was so happy, and that light, proud feeling, accompanied me through my entire trip as I watched the tips of palm trees begin to emerge.

The view from my balcony.

Suddenly, I felt free.

I’d made a move. Finally, I had decided that no one was coming to save me, but me. I let go of the ex-partner and hope I still carried that he’d change his mind. As soon as I did, a new path opened. And I began to trust myself.

No one tells us this about heartbreak, but we’re the ones that have to get ourselves to move on. It is a conscious choice – a shift in energy – and it doesn’t come from the outside.

Emerging from the long flight and an almost equally long wait in immigration, the L.A. sun felt so good on my winter-dulled skin. We can do so much more than we think.

Not only did Joycelyne cook me dinner the day of my arrival, but she also prepared my room with lovely touches like a box of daily fortunes and a cute welcome sign with my name on it. What a treat! The room had a princess bed, a huge bathroom and overlooked the Hollywood sign. It was incredible, from beginning to end, and I met the most amazing group of people. 

They were fellow creatives, artists, and hustlers, making their living. 

The whole trip was filled with lessons and realizations in my personal transformation story, but the first and biggest was seeing how Joycelyne lived.

I had been beating myself up over not having a family at my age. On repeat, I heard, “it just isn’t in the cards for me” (yup, that victim story). And I was ashamed too. Of the fact that I had only just recently discovered my path and that it wasn’t ever going to be the conventional one. I wasn’t going to be happy going to work and coming home and paying toward a mortgage until the day I died. I knew I was always going to be a creative and an explorer, healing myself and others along the way.

And while I had been afraid to own who I am, Joyceline used similar things as motivation and cause for celebration. She showed me that life could be beautifully rewarding and have plenty of purpose and love when we re-write ourselves out of blind corners – we just need to change the “shoulds”, the “have-to’s” and the “musts”, and allow for our own individuality with faith and acceptance. She showed me that creativity, doing a hundred different things based on our talents, and living an unconventional life can be incredibly enriching and wonderful.

Joyceline attracts lots of attention but lives in a humble, creative commune sort of way, together with a wonderful group of creative souls who function together like a family.

It was truly exciting. Every day, there was an invitation for an event to go to. A premier, a charity event, or magic performance with her companion, Bill the magician. Sadly, Bill has since left us, and I am so grateful for having met him. He did my astrolocation and hand readings, and we even went to brunch at The Magic Castle, where we chatted about Prague. Joyceline helped him up the stairs, while I petted his dog, who waited for treats under the table.

I loved the way he gruffly rejected my help, and then focused on his stories. A lifetime of magic.

Everyone I met was HUSTLING, fulfilling their ambitions and purpose. What a breath of fresh air. And finally, a place where I felt I was in a community that matched my values as a person! Here, people believed in the (im)possible and felt inspired enough to work for it, no matter how “crazy” it seemed.

Mario, the best storyteller I have ever met, spoke directly to my spiritual and philosophical ways. He shared his photography and short stories with me, and I helped work on his screenplay. We even filmed a few scenes from it together! Wendell the amazing musician acted the part of the detective, and I played the therapist (no surprise there). It was so much fun, so rewarding, and so atypical.

The crew during one of our philosophizing sessions.

But most of all, Joycelyne was my inspiration for living life to the fullest, using her gifts, and embracing change and possibility. We’d go off in her jeep together with her bodyguard, Michael, to any one of the aforesaid events. One night, at a cookie shop opening, we spent time with a funny, charming woman who later turned out to be a Bond girl (incidentally, she left by running into the street, chasing her cab down fearlessly). I’m not a movie star chaser – but I love meeting people, hearing their stories, and being around empowered, motivated, and similarly creative beings. That’s my jam, and this time was magical.

Each day, I went exploring. I did hikes in the Hollywood Hills, went to the Griffith Observatory, rented a car, and spent time in Joshua Tree National Park. I did a tour around the homes of the rich and the famous, met up with my poetry friends, and my dear friend Andrew. I even managed to meet up with my producer friend, Robert. I went to museums, took photos, and wrote – in short, I found myself reborn. On the bike by the ocean, in Santa Monica, on the trails near Joshua Tree, in the desert trailer under the stars; little by little, all the parts of me that grief had broken off, returned.

What I learned was that as long as I had myself, I would be okay, and I could create a beautiful life using all of my innate talents and wisdoms. I am so grateful to Joyceline for this lesson.

We can exist in many ways in the world, and we don’t have to judge what being a success looks like – success lies in our ability to follow our own unique soul’s path in this world. It’s not about what anyone else wants or thinks.

You are your way.